


As Above So Below

by Wayward_Rangers_Daughter



Category: Supernatural
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-23
Updated: 2017-11-21
Packaged: 2019-01-04 07:53:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12164676
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wayward_Rangers_Daughter/pseuds/Wayward_Rangers_Daughter
Summary: After being stabbed by Lucifer, Cas wakes up alone and human. Believing that his mortal state is Chucks way of punishing him for his numerous failings, Cas resigns himself to live out what time his father has given him in penance. Fast forward eight months to a small town in Oklahoma where Sam and Dean are investigating a case involving the death of three nuns. When the local diocese sends help they encounter a familiar face.





	1. A Man of God Once More.

**Author's Note:**

> I own nothing.
> 
> This is just some ramblings of my brain as I wait for the new season. I haven't addressed the whole alt. universe Mary rescue or the Jack situation... Just assume everything is fine.   
> _____________________________________________________________________________

Father Novak made the sign of the cross and rose from where he knelt at the altar. Raising his eyes towards the great crucifix at the front of the cathedral, the priest shook his head at the still confusing image of Jesus nailed to the cross. Why Christians chose to use such a gruesome moment as their symbol of faith would never cease to astound and confound the man. Shaking his head, he moved towards the confessionals where a line of parishioners had begun to form. Confessional duty was perhaps the most challenging for the new priest. He found many of the so-called sins committed by his flock to be trite and at times laughable. However, he would dutifully absolve each penitent of their guilt, ever mindful of his own enormous burden and glad to be able to lift such a weight from any person’s soul. Entering his side of the Confessional, the priest made the sign of the cross yet again as the first of the penitent situated themselves on the opposite side of the screen.

 _____________________________________________

**Hydro, Oklahoma**

Sam rubbed his eyes tiredly before refocusing on the laptop in front of him, three dead nuns in the last two months, each with their throats slit and found hanging upside down from trees near Dead Women’s Crossing, seven miles out of town.

“Any luck?”

Sam looked up as Dean entered the motel room, “No. Dean, it doesn’t make any sense. From what I can tell no one in the community would have any reason to dislike the sisters.”

“Except maybe some of the kids they teach”

Sam glared at his brother as Dean handed him his salad. “Be serious Dean.”

“I am. Don’t tell me you forgot our stint at St. whazit Academe. That mother superior had it out for us man. I still get antsy when I see a yardstick”

Rolling his eyes Sam looked back at the laptop as Dean unconsciously rubbed his behind, “It was St. Basils and You were the one who kept causing trouble. As I recall she seemed to like me well enough.” 

“Whatever. Anyways, Father Milton said that the Archdioceses will be sending someone out to assist our investigation.”

Sam shook his head, “Great! Just what we need, a babysitter.”

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Father Milton rose from his seat as the FBI agents entered his office, “Agents, a pleasure to see you again. If you gentleman will follow me, Father Novak is in the garden.”

Sam stumbled and looked to Dean mouthing ‘Father Novak?’.

Shrugging Dean shook his head in confusion, though a hesitant hopefulness lit the older hunter’s eyes.

As they entered the church garden, the hunters saw the priest standing with his back towards them, observing a bed of flowers.

“Father, these are the agents in charge of the case of our poor sisters.”

Turning towards them, the polite smile that had graced the father’s face tightened into one of shock and pain upon seeing who the agents were.

“Cas?”

Father Milton looked at Dean in surprise, “I wasn’t aware you knew Father Novak!”

Sam was the first to recover, looking at the older priest with a forced smile, “Um… Yes, we um… we worked a case a few years back and Cas, Um… Father Novak assisted in some, lore research.”

“Oh my, that must have been an interesting case.”

Sam nodded, “Ya, it... it was. Um, a guy thought he was the devil. Anyways, we should probably get to it. um...”

“Yes, of course, well if you need anything please don’t hesitate to ask.” Sam watched the priest walk back to the church before turning to find Dean dragging Cas into a fierce hug.

“How the Hell are you alive Cas? What are you doing pretending to be a priest?”

Disengaging from the hug, Cas smoothed out his cassock and looked from one brother to the other. “I’m not pretending, Dean. My father saw fit to bring me back, but he has left me without my grace as punishment for my failings. I have much to atone for, so I have dedicated what life I have been given in service of Heaven, as I should have done all along.”

Sam and Dean looked at each other in shock.


	2. Job 38:11."Hitherto shalt thou come, but no further

“So, what you are telling me is you have no idea what killed the sisters.” Cas rubbed his eyes tiredly as he sat on the motel bed. “When the cardinal asked me to assist in the FBI investigation I figured it was some sort of demon, but when I looked into it there were no demonic omens.”

Dean took a swig from his beer and shrugged, “We had the same thought, especially with Lucifer Jr on the loose, but we have ten different signs from ten different monsters and none of them makes a whole explanation.

Cas nodded and took a swig from his own bottle. He raised an eyebrow at Dean’s snort.

“Sorry man, it’s just the whole priest thing… didn’t think drinking was allowed.”

Cas just shrugged, “It’s not encouraged but there are no rules against it either.”

“Guys…” Sam looked up from his laptop with a sad expression, “Victim four just dropped.”

The other two moved to sand behind the younger hunter as Sam read the latest police dispatch,

“Sister Mary Agnes, 36, Reported missing by Mother Superior Jude of the Sacred Virgin orphanage. Her body was found twenty minutes ago by some kids, same MO as the others.”

“Damn it” Dean scrubbed his face tiredly. “We need to nip this in the bud, now!”

“Agreed.”

“Right, I’ll go to the scene and see if I can’t dig up any more clues, Sam… You and Cas head to the Church and see what you can dig up on the sister.”

Cas nodded and moved to grab his jacket as Sam closed the laptop and Dean grabbed the Impala’s keys.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sam sat in the church watching as Cas spoke with the grieving mother of the latest victim. He still couldn’t wrap his head around Cas being alive and a priest. After a long conversation, the brothers had been forced to accept that Cas would remain with the church after their investigation was over. The fallen angel truly believed that this was his punishment and that by dedicating his life to god, that he might earn some small measure of forgiveness.  Closing his eyes, Sam bowed his head, “Chuck, Um.. I know I haven’t done this in a while, but… you see, the thing is, Cas, I know he did some bad stuff, but he did it for the right reasons. I get that he rebelled but, isn’t that part of having free will?”

“That it is Sam.”

Sam jumped in his seat and just barely bit back his shout of surprise as Chuck appeared next to him. Looking down at the shorter man Sam smiled slightly before looking back at Cas, “Then why are you punishing him?”

“I’m not. I didn’t bring Castiel back, Sam. Lucifer destroyed his grace but he never died. I’m not sure what happened to be honest.”

“Then why leave him like this?”

Chuck smiled, “Well, when I first realized that Castiel was basically human I was going to fix everything, but then I realized that this was what he needed. My son has held such guilt over his actions for so long, and no matter what I say he will always feel as if he should be punished. This way, he can serve his penance and do so with relatively little harm.”

Sam looked at Chuck in shock, “What do you mean relatively?”

Chuck cringed, “before joining this order, Castiel found his way to the Opus Dei. They are a bit more stringent and um… self-destructive.”

Sam’s eyes widened in shock as his head snapped back towards the angel turned priest. “As in Da Vinci code, self-mortification Opus Dei?”

Chuck nodded, “That was the only time I interfered, I sent the monsignor some divine inspiration to assign Castiel to a different order. You can’t even begin to imagine what it is like to have your child praying to you for salvation while beating himself bloody. I almost ended it there, except that after each time I saw some of Castiel’s guilt recede.”

Sam flinched at Chuck's description, he now understood why Cas flinched when dean hugged him though. “So, now what?”

Chuck sighed, “I need to talk to my son, but not here.” Before Sam could respond, Chuck was gone.


	3. Bless Me Father

Cas entered the confessional, the recent case and working with the Winchesters again was testing the fallen angels resolve and he needed guidance. Kneeling, he made the sign of the cross “Bless me, father, for I have sinned, it has been two days since my last confession.”

“And what are your sins, my child?”

“I am conflicted, Father. I have done such harm in my life, caused harm to so many. I know I have much to atone for. In fact, my past sins are what ultimately led me to take my holy orders, to dedicate my life to my Father in Heaven and follow his command without question or hesitation, as I should have always done.  But, Father, this assignment I have been given is testing my resolve and commitment to my vows. Before I became a priest, even though I did so much wrong, I also helped people, Father. I know that is no excuse. I know that doing the wrong thing for the right reason is still a sin. This case that I am assisting in, it is not my first time working with the… authorities, on such matters. In the past, I would aid in such investigations and do all I could to stop the monsters that inhabit this world. When I took my vows, I renounced such a life because even though I help people I still harmed more than I saved, and now I feel as though I am being tested, Father. I feel conflicted and don’t know what to do.”

“My son, it sounds as though the real question is do you truly wish to blindly follow with obedience? Isn’t the act of making mistakes part of what being human and having free will is all about?”

“If you only knew what I have done with that free will, Father”

“Tell me, my son. Confess all your sins.”

Castiel felt tears in his eyes, “I can’t Father. Some of my sins are so egregious that I can never speak them aloud. I can only pray that God will look upon my life of devotion, pitiful though it is, with some small mercy, and when I am at last called home, will grant me a merciful end.”

Chuck’s heart broke as he listened to the pain in his son’s voice, “Tell me my son, which of these egregious sins that you carry in your heart do you view as the most unforgivable? The sin of rebellion or the sin of Fratricide?”

“W…what?” Castiel looked up in shock

“Tell me, was it a sin when you defied heaven’s order to kill Dean Winchester? Was it a sin when you stormed the gates of Hell a second time to rescue Sam Winchester from Lucifer’s cage? Was it a sin when you killed hundreds of your brothers and sisters in order to prevent Raphael from restarting the apocalypse and torching the planet?”

“How… How do you…”

“You rebelled and fell from the host Castiel. You did what only one other of the host ever dared to do, you took your destiny into your own hands and used free will. The only sins I see in your heart my son are the sins of self-recrimination and of surrendering your free will. You became a priest to surrender yourself because you feel that the only way you can purge your non-existent soul is to once again become a slave to the will of Heaven.”

Castiel knelt, frozen in fear, “F…Father?”


End file.
